I'm tired. I feel defeated and broken. I'm tired of fighting for significance. I know I am important. I know I am worthy of love. I know that I am significant enough to fill someone's heart with joy, passion, and a desire to fight to the death for my presence in their their life. I'm worth it. I'm worth the good treatment and respect. I'm worth the blood, the sweat, and the tears. I'm significant, aren't I? Yes, darling, you are beautiful. You are worthy of love. You're important enough to cause someone's heart to skip wildly and long for the moment when they can just run & leap into your arms. You're worth someone's time. You are more than you think. Smarter, wiser, more graceful, beautiful, and tenderhearted. You are so important. But God, I feel like I'm only second best, so often left & forgotten. I feel like I'm the needy annoyance. But Daddy, Papa, Lord, I want to be loved! I want someone to want me. I want so badly for the one's I love to love me! I tired of hurting. Of being left & forgotten. Of being the replaceable one. I want someone, just one, who I deem important to think the world of me. I'm tired, so very clearly tired.
I want to go home. I miss my family. I miss feeling the warmth of the atmosphere that surrounds me when I know I'm with people that love me. One's that I am not a burden to. One's that ache when I ache and laugh when I am filled with joy. I want someone to enjoy me.
Poison & Wine; The Civil Wars
